We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
