everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
