we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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