I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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