I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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