He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
