goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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