it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
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