thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
someone threw a dead crab at me
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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