It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
