need another drink. this is the easiest way
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
