does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize