were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
