This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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