is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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