a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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