All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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