we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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