My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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