I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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