Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
