He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
You dont lie about slip and slides
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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