Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
