We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
