So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
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