Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
