Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Is it penis luge time yet?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Randomize
