I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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