We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
