My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize