He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
