shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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