erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Its about making memories worth repressing
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
