I think I just saw someone hide a body.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
