So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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