i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize