Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
