think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Randomize
