Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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