ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
