i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
