i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
