Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
