Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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