I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
