and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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