it hurts more in the daytime
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at templeÂ
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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