His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
is it fun? or sober?
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