dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
You took a bar mat shot.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
