That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel like a drive thru vagina
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize