so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
