and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
