the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
